LadiesLodgeEnt. : Can we get to know you?
Janet: My name is Adegboyega Janet, student of English in Kwara State University and I live off campus.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : That’s great; I guess we would be having lots of vocabularies and oral pronunciations in this session with you?
Janet: (Chuckles) well not completely, but for sure.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Well, just on a random scale, we’d like you to give us any update as far as the lady folks in Kwara State University are concerned.
Janet: Hhhmm….I am really glad this session is happening because I already have this talk and recent situation ladies in the institution are involved in or going through if I must say.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Great, we’d love to hear you please.
Janet: There is this thing going on in Kwasu, it is more like a trend, like a girl can’t see a guy in a car or maybe he is wearing all these confirm designers, maybe supreme, Gucci or Versace, they don’t even want to know how he came about it and now in Kwasu it is something that is common that some people can now even identify some gee guys in Kwasu but despite this fact, some girls are still fall victims for it. Just around last week, a friend of mine was telling me that I should be careful of taking free rides from guys and all and I said to her that I can’t be taking free rides because that’s how I have being trained at home and she let me in on what is happening. She said can I believe that she was one day with some people and some girls were passing by, the guys there were then tagging the girls saying this person’s fortune is not more than a Toyota Camry, so I don’t know maybe it’s the shape of the car that they are using to tag them or the price of the car, they tag them with cheap cars not even big kinds. So the point at this is that most of the girls have actually unknowingly or stupidly in her own stupid way allowed something go out of them and they are not even aware of it and if we should trace it, their parents must have warned them about misbehaving in school but when they get to school, they turn to a whole different person, you see them being the b***hes of the class, feeling like almighty students in the class, but when you hear these guys talk of them, they’d be tagging them menacingly, like I heard it and was so pissed off and these girls don’t know that this is what is really happening to them at all.
There is this other thing that they don’t really know is going on around them. There was this guy (name not disclosed), he was actually into a girl, and he is actually a play guy, so I was like how into this girl are you? He was like he is not really into her for long date or stuff, he is d kind of guy that is into 6 months or 3 months relationship, and I was like this is what is really happening. The next time we spoke at the lady, he was like, that girl? He said the girl is useless now; he has already done what he wanted with her and all. My point is that, to the girl she has seen a perfect man friend, he is a good guy and all but unknowing to her, the guy is actually embarrassing her outside and all, she can’t walk outside and most times the guy would be like that’s the girl I am talking about and all. Unfortunately for her, the guy has her picture on his phone, so the guy showed me her pix, so sure even when I am moving around school and I see the girl, I am like, oh so that’s the girl that the guy told me about and I am sure not going to be the only 1 he would show the pix to, he has male friends and it is something that is common that guys don’t really keep secrets and even such kind of secret, he’d be like oh that’s the babe I told you guys about that I did this and that to.
LadiesLodgeEnt.: This is indeed needing attention..
Janet: Most definitely. There is this other issue about ladies being careless as well. I was opportune to know about a bet that happened in another school, not in Kwasu (not disclosed). They actually made a bet about a stuck up girl, she is too mean towards guys, and she doesn’t talk to guys and usually snaps at them. So they actually had a bet that whoever succeeds in sleeping with her wins the bet and I was opportune to hear about it because one of those guys happened to be a close friend of mine , so the guy came to sought me that how can he go about tricking this girl in making her fall in love with him and me myself I am not a love expert, so I just directed him to another person that can actually help him because a girl’s life can’t be destroyed through me and I don’t know whom he later went to meet only for me to hear later on that he has won the bet, worth ^50,000 within 3 months and the girl was just done for, only for them to upload the video that they made and unknown to the girl, the video of their activity was recorded on his phone and about 3 days after, the video kind of went viral within the school, so I was just surprised when he told me that he was actually tripping for the girl but he really needed that money that was why he actually had to do the betting, so due to say let’s say ^50,000 award, the girl lost her dignity and that’s because she was careless. There is this thing I am always telling people like, if a guy should request that okay let’s have sex, you are not even meant to agree because if we should look at our forefathers, that was not the way they expressed their emotions and all to their loved ones, I’d like to refer to it as civilized way, not something that was done shrewdly. But nowadays because you want to prove that you love a guy, you now open up and the next thing is getting messed up, like what I said that the girl did not know that they made a bet , they did a video out of carelessness and the other girl that was so careless that the guy was telling me, a fellow female like me that “this is the girl I was telling you about”, this was what we did”, like the guy was explaining to me that, he took her to a shopping mall, took her to ShopRite.
Maybe because he is already in a muscle, custom, Toyota sport car, Lexus or any car that is confirm that when you go online to check the price you see that it’s worth about 15 million, ^20 million or kind of prices that make you want to feel like, damn I must get stuck to this dude. They won’t know what is actually going on, that maybe if they won’t lose their glory. Especially girls, they think these days there is nothing like charms, it is now prominent in a coded manner and they do not know because of their carelessness. Okay for example, you sit in the guy’s car, you don’t know whether he is using his car Ac to take away your fortune, or maybe even through handshakes, and you don’t expect a guy to give something and not collect something in return. Like my brother cannot come to tell me that he spent 15k on his girlfriend, I would ask him what he got in exchanged. Because I know that if he actually spent d money on me I won’t be pained because I am his sister but that he went to spend the money on another person, not his cousin, not his aunt, not even his neighbor.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Who knows, she may be his future wife.
Janet: But that kind of thing, the girl ought to think, how can a guy just come up to you and tell you, I would pay your tuition fees, take care of you, or a guy would just come and give you 20k and you’d be like you have seen a rich boyfriend without knowing you are exchanging something in return, in this present Nigeria? It doesn’t work like that at all. Just few guys are willing to help a girl out and it is really rare, but even if you because of say you love a girl you give her 10k or 20k without expecting anything from the girl, but 100 percent of girls I would say according to the way I have seen it, I am not really social but I have friends that are so social that I am able to know as it is really going on. Like they would be the ones to tell me that amidst 100 percent of girls in Kwasu, they proudly tell me that there is a slight chance that if not more than 75 percent of the girls are gunners. Because eventually most of the girls would end up being in one small cubicle like a kitchen, that is where most of them end up, so what is the essence of using…
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Come on thou, housewife is something
Janet: Yeah, true but they would be the ones taking care of the children, paying the house bills, Nepa bills, water bills and all. The woman needs not bother herself, just to sleep, wake, cook, take care of the children, so they are like what do the women need their glory for. These days if you are looking for a gee guy, you now because he is a good guy and you now check his stuffs, you did not find calabash under his car seat, don’t think that there is no calabash in the car but somehow and somewhere along the line don’t think that he can’t use something on you and even if it is to use a charm that would make the calabash invincible he would do it. There is this thing that annoys me about girls like the way I notice things, there are like they want to have a rich boyfriend by all mean. Okay now you have a rich boyfriend, ask him how he made the money, let him help you make the money as well. All this one sided livelihood that financial support is all from the guy, does not make sense, if it is going to be that he is going to be one dating you and all and he says that he is rich. Even if it is his gee thing as well, okay you ask him how he get his clients, it’s is a matter of that if you don’t want him to be caught or arrested and you want to also help, you don’t have to depend on him at all, okay you say you love me abi?, let’s make this money together, if you can’t show me how you meet your clients and all, okay set me up, because most of the things that make girls fall victim is financial status, same bad financial status that Nigeria is going through right now. Most of our parents are affected; even my parents are affected by it. I was almost tempted, I was like I if I should actually see a rich guy these days, even If he is ugly…..,then again I called my mum and I was like, mum this is what is really going on in my mind right now and I won’t lie to you, because my mum is my best friend and she was like I should remember the child of who I am, that I should not just trip over things because of present financial status and all but if I don’t have someone like that to discourage me and I am not ready to be discouraged, then I would have fallen victim of this circumstance that this guy is rich and ask him to help me, not knowing that I am also losing something in return. So if the guy tells you that you can’t do this, okay I want to be financially stable, set me up on a business, if it is a boutique he can open for you, let him open it, if it is a canteen or cafeteria, anything that would actually help you gain more. Even if it is that he should just go and build a house where his tenants would be there and he’d be the one paying you as his caretaker, he is setting you up financially but they do not just understand that, all they want is money. Let me be known with this guy, my boyfriend Is rich , he is the one that would come pick me from my lecture room, drop me in my hostel, the guy that would take you shopping and flenjor. Those girls just think about today, they don’t think about tomorrow, they are not looking ahead, these words I speak, my aunt fell victim of it but assuming she was even a glued, it won’t have hurt me that much but to the extent that she even died as a result of this circumstance. So it is something that even remembering such tragedy, it makes me never want to be anyway a victim of such at all, not now, not in the nearest future nor ever.
DEAD SILENCE…….
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Thank you for your long detailed conversation
Janet: It is how I feel.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : okay, sorry. Speaking from the heart, that’s really raw.
Janet: No problem.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Somewhere in your words, you spoke about “jazz, charms, calabash disappearing and all”. Are you being realistic or movie based? Because you know ladies love movies way too much
Janet: if you are talking movies, I don’t do Nollyhood at all, it is something that I said earlier, that I have friends date are very social and I get informed from them. I said last week one of my dear friends still came to me in my place warning me about never taking free ride, no matter how far or how close the distance. Even if the guy is looking like a good-god, never try it. They don’t speak out of context and they don’t say things because they don’t want me to move or to socialize myself, they know I am not the social type, so they’re trying to prevent me from falling victim because they know I am dumb in d social way. So they’re my eyes and ears, they tell me what they know and what they have heard. There is one of them apparently, a friend to a yahoo guy though the gee guy is not in Kwasu, somewhere around Ogbomosho or Oshogbo area. I am not saying for sure that they are involved in jazz but it is as I was told. They don’t usually kill girls; they merely just make use of their glory through jazz and charms, because killing them would be meaningless.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Okay thank you for that. Onto d next matter, you said somewhere that guys are getting riches from impure sources, so my question is that what of guys born with silver spoon or into rich homes? Are you like expecting ladies to ask their boyfriends to search the source of their parent’s wealth?
Janet: No I’m not saying they should search the source of their parent’s wealth.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : No, you said some guys are rich and girls are always about the guy, they don’t confirm where the guy got his money or riches from.
Janet: What I was saying is… Okay, this is it, a guy comes to meet me, fine he is driving a very confirm solid car. Okay and who says that even if a person comes from a rich family, who says he can’t be involved in some illegal activities to get rich? Because these days most guys don’t want to have anything to do with their parents riches at all, they want to make their own money so their parents won’t always be about the amount they have spent on them and all that in future times or when things get jiggy. So they want to be famous and rich at every possible means, so I am not saying that they have to go and ask the guy, how are you making your money? There is this adage that says,” when someone gives you fish, don’t keep receiving all the time, ask where the person is getting the fish from and teach you too how to fish”. So you just don’t want to be taking the money, you also want to be making your money yourself.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : What would you say is the way out this circumstance or situation that is becoming rampant?
Janet: Okay, there is this thing, like I said while we were talking, a friend came to warn me about taking free rides from strangers, so one of the precautionary methods I would say is that, just be careful who ever you’re moving with and wherever you are going to and please as religious as it may sound, I don’t go anywhere without telling my mum, I am always like “mum please I am going here or there” and even when I am about to write my exam, I often call to inform her that I am heading to the exam hall. Those are d few tips I think are still advisable.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : As a Kwasuite, what would you say is your own kind of guy? As you said that 100 percent of the guys are bad, some are gee guys and all, so how do you speculate your own kind of person?
Janet: Actually, I am not even into Kwasu guys at all, I don’t know why and I don’t know those that are into this gee stuff but majorly I am just not into Kwasu guy. Well, in my first year though, I had some crushes but then crush always remain as crushes, crushes die and all. My own kind of guy, I don’t really know my own kind of guy because I have not actually taken my time to speculate or search through and say these are my specifics in a guy.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : So in conclusion, what would you say is the major cause of these situation ladies get themselves into? Would you say it is the money aspect and as it is that you said some of your friends are very social and you being dumb socially. So would u say the major cause of this situation is money-wise or social-wise? Because you know sometimes too, social life or being too social can be sometimes of negative effect and consequential.
Janet: Most times these days what usually makes ladies fall into this kind of situation is usually the money issue because back home things aren’t good and then when you are in school, you are trying to explain your situation to your parents back home but they would say you have being spending carelessly and they would fail to understand but maybe if you have an elder sibling that is understanding and can help explain to them that you aren’t lying but apart from that, your parents don’t want to understand, so they would just yell on you when you need the money, so with that that kind of girl if she can’t endure for so long, maybe when all her provisions and foodstuffs are all finished and she’s even planning on trekking to school the next day, and some guy just happens to pop up to tell you he likes u and would take care of you ,definitely such girl would give an instant yes reply to the guy because she’d feel like perhaps when she says yes to him and she explains her situation to the guy he’d be willing to help out. Then social wise too affects, because there was this situation that happened when we were doing our GNS exam on French, a friend of mine said a girl was just parading the front of the exam hall before the exams, walking to and fro and some guys were looking at her and d girl was like, what if dis guys were gee guys they’d be like ehnhen, so you are parading displaying yourself for free use, so they might just get to have a chat with her after the exams and try convincing her to mingle with them from there. I would say social wise also affects or contributes to this situation but not as much as money does because for you to attend social events, it must be that you have fees for transportation and flexing.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : But you know most social parties this days, it is usually tagged “ladies free”, so you feel free to mingle with ease, like you can leave one party by 8 p.m., be at another by 10 p.m. and again another by 12 a.m. till dawn.
Janet: I understand that but that is for shows that are ladies free tagged but it’s not all these ladies free events that come with bad intent, though I have never being to any. But again mostly to me, it’s the money issue that causes it.
LadiesLodgeEnt. : Lastly, a thought just came thru to me, according to your analysis, so you say money is the major problem of most ladies or should I say ladies re just into money?
Janet: Well let me say from my own angle, like if I am all about money, den I sure won’t be involved in singing, writing and some other stuffs I do to keep myself busy and earning, because I also want to know how to go about another asking my parents for everything and even when I get from them d little or much I get would just be as an extra money. So however it wants to come in, they won’t really think about that.
LadiesLodgeEnt.: Well we are very glad to have being able to get so much information and knowledge from you, thank you for your time.